Games People Play

There was a huge debate about the mascots for the Sydney Olympics in 2000.

“I say, it could be Syd, Millie and Olly,” said one enthusiastic guy whose say would be heard

“Oh yes – Syd, the platypus, Millie, the Echidna, and Olly, the Kookaburra!” This guy’s say, too, was heard.

“Nah! Too boring! Syd, the biker, Millie, the biker, and Olly, the biker,” said another. Clearly, they had too many guys whose say would be heard.

Yet another one objected, “Not THREE bikers! We need a bird in there. I suggest Syd, the biker, Millie the biker, and
Olly, the wigeon.”

Globe Warming

"I've been working on this science-fiction novel about a biker in a futuristic world..." confided one budding author to another
"Oh yeah? How does it start like?" asked the nonchalant guy opposite him.
"It goes 'And from below the glowing horizon, rose a giant globe of fire and spite - What once used to be yellow, was now white!' Whaddaya think?"
"Oh really! The white Sun?"

And Bob's your uncle

There was this peculiar guy called Bob, who had a peculiar habit of killing people. Why? Because they often caught him in his peculiar act of stealing cookies. The reason why this was peculiar was that Bob was a generally well-off guy, with a peculiarly huge bike collection in his garage, and there was no reason why he should need to steal anything at all, let alone cookies. Peculiarly, he did.

But he never killed more than one person a day (I told you he was peculiar) and never have more than one cookie at a time. Peculiar. Singularly Peculiar.
All he'd have is 'un

My Name is Earl

There's this particularly interesting teevee show that starts off with
"You know that guy you see, when you stop off at the convenience store in that little town on the way to Grandma's house? Sort of shifty looking fella who buys a packet of smokes, a couple-a lotto tickets and a 'Tall Boy' at 10 AM in the morning? The kind of guy you wait to come out before you and your family go in? Well... that's me. My name is Earl."

Earl is this jobless ne'er-do-well guy with no respect for authority or just about anyone, and he prefers driving cars to bikes. But he then turns to reforming himself and goes about 'undoing' all the harm he's done in his life, all the while, crossing off those things from his 'list'. Still prefers the car.

Now that you've got the basic plot of a show that you've seen a hundred times on the telly, i'll pitch in a couple of words for Earl:

"Earl: He'd a vision"

Yorkshire is proud of you

There was this little city in central England, located on the River Aire. A biker came and settled there, in an area known as Hyde Park, and a rather good biker he was. He took a particular interest in a lot of things and people around the city, and became one of the most enthusiastic residents of the city.
Once when he won the county's biker of the year, the presented to him, a special plaque. It read:

To
Our Leeds' Avid Son...

Oldboys

There was this biking gang - all of them barely thirty odd years old. On one biking trip through some particularly dense forest, they were bitten by the pse-pse-pse fly (and a particularly rare variety, at that). They were all infected with a particularly miserable disease which caused them to grow long white beards, long white hairdos, and ditto for mooches; their skin to shrivel up; their teeth to fall down; their memory to weaken... In short, it was a bikers' gang - sans everything.
"Tch, Tch," an acquaintance, remarked,
"Early, they wizened"

Ghost Rider

There was this particularly dreaded biker who used to terrorize the natives of a tiny village on the outskirts of the tiny town of Whistleville. One day a man ran through the streets of the village, warning everyone:
"He's 'ere! The biker's 'ere!"
"Whoch biker do you mean?" asked Gump, Forrest Gump
"Hell! He that we'd shun!"

Holly-day season

There's a man who's dying of an obscure variety of parrot fever. His young son hears about a biker who's probably the only one who can cure the diseased man. The biker is summoned .
"Sure I can cure him, kid" he says, "But I'll need some special herbs: Some psyllium, a bit of juniper, and a handful of holly"
"Holly, sir? as in Hollywood?"
"Don't be daft!
Holly, the weed, son"

They say 'tis the supreme goal

Inspired by the recent success of the History Channel, some bikers decide to start a TeeVee Channel on similar lines. Its called the 'Knowledge Channel'. What's gonna be there on it? Well, even they don't know yet. But they've thought of nice catchy tag-line:
"Hourly, the wisdom"